Someone’s Working on a TTRPG Hexcrawl Map of Donkey Kong Island

This is the kind of project where I’m split evenly between derision, admiration and respect. Someone is actually doing this thing, with as much accuracy to the 16-bit games (and DK64 too) as is merited, however much that may be. And they’re doing it, not as some D&D adjunct, but I would say as an accessory to an unproduced (as yet?) Donkey Kong RPG.

If you don’t know what that is, and I’d admit it’s meaning is sorta inside baseball…. A hexcrawl is a kind of RPG adventure that’s either partly or totally undirected. A large expanse of terrain is marked out on a hexagonal grid, secretly on a gamemaster’s sheet. The players of his game may have their own hexagonal grid, either completely unmarked or with only the most obvious features pre-inscribed upon it.

D&D hexcrawl example, from The Alexandrian

In the GM’s notes, some, many or possibly even all the hexes are keyed to a list of contents, waiting for an unsuspecting party of adventures to wander through/blunder into it. There might be deadly monsters, friendly allies, neutral NPCs, dungeons, lairs or treasures to find there, or some combination of these things. Just walking into a hex doesn’t guarantee finding what’s hiding there, if hiding something is, it may require a concerted search; or, the party might find it easily. It’s inherently a sandbox style of play, but the randomness of finding adventure, and the possibility that whatever might be there could be missed, multiplies the sense of possibility in the game world. A group might travel through a hex many times before a well-hidden encounter might get noticed.

This is the style of gameplay that the inspired creator seeks to bring to Donkey Kong Island, site of the 16-bit SNES classic Donkey Kong Country and its sequels. The inspiration is the same kind that craftsdwarfs in Dwarf Fortress get, referred there as a strange mood. Those moods can turn out well or badly, but if successful they produce wonders.

It’s an amazing idea, and a bit awe-inspiring, and at least a little bit ridiculous. But lots of things that I thought were ridiculous became immensely popular, Kingdom Hearts is proof enough of that. Actually, I still think Kingdom Hearts is ridiculous, and more ridiculous than this.

The nom de net of the creator of this is Farmer Gadda, and they have both a Neocities blog and a Bluesky presence, which is where I found out about this. A project like this, I’d have it pegged for a Mastodon announcement, but at least I found out about it somewhere.

There are two posts so far, an introduction and a page of system considerations. They’ve thought about it at least that hard, and I can respect that kind of maddened obsession, since after all have I not harbored a not-very-secret Rampart obsession for decades, since before Donkey Kong Country’s release even? (Checking facts: Rampart was 1990; DKC was 1994.)

Screenshot of the first post. Imagining having the task of what to hide in that giant bust’s nostrils?

So I say, shine on you improbable diamond! Keep on doing what no one’s done before! We eagerly await word of your efforts, and if you the reader would like to help support this crazy endeavor, you can hear evidence of its progress a week early by contributing to their Patreon.

A Speedrun of a Joke Donkey Kong Romhack

I hope you’re ready for something pleasingly pointless. Let’s review.

  1. In 2024 Kayinworks wrote an essay about games as models vs. toys. I’d describe the same dichotomy as simulationism vs gamism. Neither are necessarily bad, but their aims are different. Models, like model trains, take some real-world thing and try to give you its essence. Toys use a real-world thing to lend flavor to a friendlier, more accessible, but in some cases more pandering experience. That’s an oversimplification, it’s a great article, well-thought and full of nuance, but it gets across what you need for item 2. (It also mentions and links to the preposterous and awesome Ginormo Sword.)
  2. Taking inspiration from that essay’s description of changing old games, modernizing their looks and in some cases changing game rules to be more acceptable to players, although sometimes in ways that miss the point of why those old games do things they way they do, plourples created a romhack for NES Donkey Kong that does away with such quaint notions like Mario having a jump that’s only his own height tall. “What’s that? This ruins the entire game? But it’s for Quality of Life!”
  3. Darkman425 and Spikestuff speedran that game. (Youtube link, 48 seconds)

I’m only sad they didn’t do the version with the Conveyor Belt level.

Beat the Springs in Donkey Kong

Another arcade classic strategy rundown, and again c0ncerning Donkey Kong. As the video rightly notes, the Springs board, a.k.a. Elevators, is most devoted players’ greatest barrier to playing to the kill screen, and even pros mess it up sometimes. I think it’s the worst part of the game, personally. Donkey Kong is great, says I, because it’s open to multiple strategies, while the later Elevators boards have to be finished a specific way, all because of those springs. That way is what this video (4m) is about.

Sadly the video has been made non-embedable, so it’s up to you to follow the link, if you care. The video encapsulates information on donkeykongforum.net (which it mislinks). That link is some hardcore geekery, of the kind beloved to Set Side B’s cadre of pixelated aliens, so please take a look.

Image from donkeykongforums.net.

Here’s the basics, in text form. Donkey Kong gets more difficult over the course of five “levels.” These are different from “boards,” a.k.a. “racks” or “screens.” In the corner of the screen there’s a notice, “L=X” where X is some number. That’s the Level. It goes up by one every time you finish a Rivets board.

The problem is, starting with Level 2, the spots at which the springs hit the ground is slightly randomized. The final climb up to Pauline’s platform is super dangerous, since Mario is vulnerable the whole way. Level 4 is the hardest difficulty for the springs on Elevators, and you have to handle it a very specific way: climb up to the first safe spot, wait for a spring that comes out bouncing at a specific location (near DK’s right foot) then running to another safe spot, then waiting for another specific spring speed to rush over and up the ladder.

So go forth and conquer the elevators, and as Coily the Sprite reminds us:

Eh-heh-heh-heh! (whistles) Image borrowed from https://tomsmith.bandcamp.com/track/coilee-2.

Donkey Kong High-Level Basics

Continuing with this week’s theme of classic arcade strategy videos, these Donkey Kong videos are from a variety of Youtube sources.

Rob O’Hara on basic strategy (9½ minutes). Note that he’s playing on one of those multi-machine emulators so the sounds are a little off.

arcadeimpossible talks with former world record holder Hank Chen (22 minutes):

Getting deeper into the weeds now. Here’s a high-level strategy video on just the Barrel (a.k.a. Girders) boards (41 minutes!). All the following videos are from Chambers_N Gaming:

Was that a lot to say on this one subject? Well hold on, that was just part 1! Here’s part 2, which is another 42 minutes!

And here’s detailed strategy on the Rivets (a.k.a. Ziggurat) boards, although it’s “only” 19 minutes:

That a single game can inspire so much discussion so long after its release speaks volumes about the quality of its design. A lot of it has to do with how much randomness is in the game. Even the best players die sometimes! Donkey Kong is heavily resistant to rote patterns, although there’s still things the player can do to subtly affect each board, and make it more manageable. On the Barrels boards, on higher levels, you can affect when barrels decide to come down ladders by steering towards them as they reach their decision point.

Sundry Sunday: K. Rool’s Villain Song

In response to Bowser’s “Peaches” song from the Super Mario Bros. Movie (the later one, not the 90s one), and a certain Smash Bros. announcement from a few years back, Alex Henderson Animation made a villain’s anthem for Donkey Kong’s (other) nemesis, King K. Rool, ruler of the Kremlings. My suggestion is to turn on subtitles; I’d never have understood all the lyrics without them. (10 minutes) The animation is pretty good for a small production.

I hope this isn’t spoiling anything by now, but just in case here’s a bit of space….


In Donkey Kong Bananza, King K. Rool is the secret final boss, and not only that but at the end of the game the Mario and Donkey Kong series kind of cross over, as the final level and boss fight are in New Donk City, which is attacked(briefly) by K. Rool, but saved by Donkey Kong and Pauline. I wonder if this explains why streets in NDC, in Mario Odyssey, bear the names of Donkey Kong characters?

Anyway, I guess the only real take away is Mario’s world has a long-standing problem with big reptilian megalomaniacs stirring up trouble. And big primates too, but sometimes they’re heroic. Come to think of it, Mario’s been a villain too, and in a Donkey Kong game….

Sundry Sunday: Donkey Kong Planet & DKTV

Sundry Sunday is our weekly feature of fun gaming culture finds and videos, from across the years and even decades.

Just a few days ago I linked to the complete two-season run of the CG Donkey Kong Country cartoon that got made and aired on Saturday mornings. Well, there’s more where that came from.

As it turns out the people who animated it, “Medialab,” had other plans for the character. It’s not very well known, but in France they made another show, a general cartoon anthology, with the characters performing in bumpers between them, like the original version of Cartoon Planet. It was originally called Donkey Kong Planet, and it’s both bizarre and entirely in French.

Then, the model who was the co-star, along with the DKC characters, left the show. They rebranded it to DKTV, and, um.

You have a choice. You can start off with this 10-minute explainer video by Carlito. It’s the standard Youtuber, “can you BELIEVE this happened??” video. It’s not really bad, I’ve definitely seen worse, but it’s not really a sterling example of the genre either. Here it is embedded:

Or, if you’re a jaded connoisseur of bizarre video like I am, you might want to just go ahead and jump into the deep end of the pool, unprepared. If you’re like that, I got you covered. This is what you want (41 minutes). Don’t say you weren’t warned.

More about this show is on the Super Mario Wiki.

Kosmic Figures Out How To Defeat Donkey Kong’s Kill Screen

Kosmic is a speedrunner who usually focuses on Super Mario Bros., but he’s reached the kill screen in Donkey Kong before. With some help, he’s figured out a way to complete that game’s “kill screen,” the point where it’s usually impossible to continue.

At Level 22 of Donkey Kong, there is a bug that causes the game to only give Mario (nèe Jumpman) 400 bonus timer points to complete the level. (The screen displays 4000, but that’s caused by a different glitch.) Playing normally, that’s not enough time to reach higher than the second girder on-screen.

However. If the player has Mario climb the first broken latter, then hold down for four frames then up for one, Mario will climb up off the top of it by one pixel. Continuing to do this, Mario can continue to ascend the screen. When he reaches Pauline’s height, the game will declare the level completed and move on to the next screen.

As it turns out, the bonus count on the Barrels screen is tied to the barrels that Donkey Kong throws, and the timing on those is somewhat random. If DK is slow at emitting those rolling obstacles, rarely, that will give Mario just enough time to reach Pauline at the top, and advance to the next level.

Doing this physically is essentially impossible. The player would have to waggle the joystick extremely quickly (and loudly), yet with the precise timing to consistently raise Mario’s position, to get him up the screen in time, and even if that worked, he’d still have to be lucky enough that Donkey Kong was slow at rolling barrels. But in emulation, with tool assistance, Kosmic managed to get to the top and finish the level. Then using other tricks and glitches, he managed to finish the next three levels (Elevators, Barrels again and Cement Factory) too, before his luck ran out at the next Barrels screen and he was unable to continue.

Here’s his 29 minute video explaining his feat. Or, if you’d like to avoid the general description of what this means, you could start at this point 11 minutes in.

Sundry Sunday: DK Rap Remixed by Kirkhope and Substantial

Sundry Sunday is our weekly feature of fun gaming culture finds and videos, from across the years and even decades.

People remember the DK Rap, the theme song from Donkey Kong 64 back on the Nintendo 64. It’s certainly memorable, and arguably iconic, although most would agree it’s not great as a rap? It was written by George Andreas (who wrote and sang the lyrics) and Grant Kirkhope (who composed the music).

We’re referred to it before here in a Sunday Sundry about brentalfloss’ excellent (but very dark) 2018 parody version, which kept most of the music the same. Well here’s an update that’s changes the music and lyrics, with the music from original composer Kirkhope, and the words written and sung by rapper Substantial, and by all rights it’s a much better song. Hear for yourself (3 minutes), it’s (puts on monocle) remarkably funky:

Shmuplations Translates An Interview With An Arcade Donkey Kong Programmer

The name of Ikegami Tsushinki Co. is a bit better known nowadays. For a long while Nintendo was content to just let the world believe they were entirely responsible for their early blockbuster arcade hit Donkey Kong, but eventually word got out that all of its program, and large portions of its design, were the work of a number of uncredited employees of that company. While Nintendo owns the trademarks over the game, the copyright of the arcade game’s code appears to be owned by Ikegami Tsushinki, or perhaps held in joint between them and Nintendo.

One of Shireru Miyamoto’s original notes for the design of Donkey Kong, at that time envisioned as a Popeye game.

Which is it precisely? Look, when you write a daily blog you don’t have time to hunt up Japanese legal records. What is important though is that this is why Nintendo doesn’t have the rights to just rerelease arcade Donkey Kong willy-nilly. To date, they have used it once since the classic arcade era: an inclusion in the N64 Rare title Donkey Kong 64. Mind, there has been an Arcade Archives release from Hamster; I presume they got the rights from both Nintendo and Ikegami Tsushinki. It’s for this reason that Nintendo almost always presents NES Donkey Kong in compilations, which is similar but differs from the arcade game in many important ways.

Hirohisa Komanome was one of the people at that company that worked in concert with Nintendo’s Shigeru Miyamoto, and several other employees of Ikegami Tsushinki, to complete the design and implement Donkey Kong from Miyamoto’s notes, finishing it in only around three months. Donkey Kong came out in July of 1981, meaning it was probably began around the beginning of the year. The quickness of their work would prove to be essential: remember, the American arcade industry collapsed in 1983, when many promising games would be abandoned or released to greatly diminished profits. If Donkey Kong had been released a little later, it may not have become such a fondly remembered hit.

Kate Willaert commissioned the translation by Alex at Shumplations of an article written by Hirohisa Komanome that was published in 1997 in the Japanese publication bit. It’s up on their site here. Given that Nintendo tends to be very tight-lipped when letting their employees talk to the press, it’s probably good for us that Donkey Kong was implemented by an outside company, or else this account of the game’s creation may never have seen print, or our eyes.

Donkey Kong: A Record of a Struggle translated into English (shmuplations.com)

Sundry Sunday: brentalfloss’ DK Rap 2018 (NSFW)

Sundry Sunday is our weekly feature of fun gaming culture finds and videos, from across the years and even decades.

Six years ago brentalfloss did a parody video of the infamous “DK Rap” from the opening of Donkey Kong 64, updated for the times. It’s hilarious, but also disturbing and sad. Summary: Donkey Kong became a gun nut, Diddy is a MRA incel jerk, because of Tiny bees are dying out, Lanky’s the reason this video is NSFW, and Chunky’s… well, you can find out for yourself.

It’s all pretty saddening, but truthfully in line with how game culture has gotten worse over the years too. Ah well, at least Parappa’s still good and pure!

DK Rap 2018, “Where are they now” (brentalfloss on Youtube, 4 minutes)

Romhack Thursday: DKAFE

On Romhack Thursdays, we bring you interesting finds from the world of game modifications.

We’ve not done Romhack Thursday for a while. As the winds of the ‘net, and my attention, blow around randomly, sometimes there’s more things that seem worthy of posting than others. This one definitely fits the bill though.

We’ve posted about 10yard’s intriguing Donkey Kong hacks Galakong and Vector Kong before. I don’t think they’re actually hacks in the classic sense of the term, modifications of a game’s software intended to run on its original hardware, or at least an emulation or simulation of it. Galakong might, and Vector Kong definitely does, rely on Lua support in MAME to produce, respectively, a version of Donkey Kong where Mario teams up with the ship from Galaga, and another version of Donkey Kong limited to the Girders stage, a.k.a. Ramps, but with sharp colorful line-drawn artwork akin to that produced by Atari’s later Vectorscan monitors.

10yard let us know that they have produced a front-end to a variety of Donkey Kong romhacks, 90 in total. It runs on Windows an Raspberry Pi, although if it runs on the latter I suppose it must also be possible to get it to work on Linux? Maybe?

It’s not just a front end though. It presents all of its mods through an interface that itself plays like Donkey Kong! You move Mario around the levels of the classic arcade game (they’re connected vertically), and each is littered with arcade machines. You can play them with coins collected them as DK rolls them through the boards, and also earned by getting good scores in each game. Collecting more coins not only gives you more chances to play, but it unlocks further games in the collection.

You download the package from the Github page linked above. You must also provide the MAME-compatible romsets for Donkey Kong, Donkey Kong Jr. and Donkey Kong 3. (It might work without without all of them, but fewer games will be available.) Of course, it’s up to you to rip, or otherwise provide, those files. If you provide them, it’ll handle all the patching for you automatically. It even includes its own custom version of MAME to play them.

Both Galakong and Vector Kong are among the hacks provided, but there’s so much more to see and play besides those, including Halloween, Christmas and Doctor Who themes hacks. There’s really too many to mention here, and I’ve only started unlocking games myself. I’ll leave you with the closing link, and some screenshots of the hacks included that I’ve managed to unlock so far.

DKAFE (by 10yard, for Windows and Raspberry Pi, on Github)

Most of the hacks include a screen like this one, that tells you what scores you must reach in order to earn coins. 3rd place usually isn’t terribly difficult to reach. For many games, a 1st place score will be reached around the time of the Conveyors board in Level 3.
This is the game selection mode. Coins you earn are rolled down the ramps from the top of the screen; you have to collect them in order for them to count!
Before starting each hack, you’re presented with a text description of the game and how it plays, and who made it.
Here’s Galakong, which has been linked from this site before. The game is slightly easier, objectively speaking, than standard Donkey Kong, but it’s easy to get your attention split between the ship and Mario and make mistakes because of it.
Pac-kong replaces the roaming fireballs with the ghosts from Pac-Man. They move mostly randomly, like the fireballs, did, but they’re much faster. You can become invincible by collecting an Energizer, which turns Mario into Pac-Man temporarily. Pac-kong’s one of the harder hacks present.
Donkey Kong Anniversary Edition changes the boards slightly, and replaces the bonus items with presents and balloons. In case you didn’t know: you can collect items off the edges of girders by jumping at them: if you hit the edge of the screen during your jump, Mario will be bounced back to around the place he leapt from, and will (usually) be unharmed!
Donkey Kong Wizardry changes the Girders level substantially. They add new pits to leap over, changes to the way the ramps tilt, and adds other surprises. You get an advantage though: if you press the Player 2 Start Button (the 2 key), it’ll freeze the fireballs for several seconds.
Donkey Kong Lava Panic adds a tide of deadly fluid constantly rising up from the bottom of the screen. It becomes important to get the lower rivets on the Rivets board before they become submerged!
The Halloween and Christmas-themed hacks change the Girder stage greatly. When barrels (or whatever analogue that hack uses for them) fall off of a gap in the middle of the screen, they may randomly decide to go either direction, adding even more uncertainty to Mario’s progress. Be careful!